repost from 6/20/05 (originally posted on xanga)

What I believe....

We are born with a natural oneness with God... and life experiences cause us to forget. Little children are filled with love. We are born optimistic. Then life throws us hardballs. But we are given signals to remember... kind people, angels in our lives, moments of peace and beauty. We seek to return to that which we were born feeling part of.
We are too often taught to think our natural belief in God is stupid, misguided or to be doubted... We are taught (particularly in this society) to be self-reliant. We are taught to revere science and deny God (-- or to revere God and deny science! As if they are inherently mutually exclusive.) We are taught not to trust. We are taught to fear. Even new age religions have a tendency to encourage us to rely on ourselves -- our divine inner self (as if it is somehow separate and individual)...
I am not God... there is so much that I don't get to control. It's none of my business. I need to keep my fingers out of and let go of tons and tons of things. Wait, God and I are one.
I need God... there is no shame in admitting that my soul yearns for connection with the loving spirit of the universe. God is not a crutch. God is not a figment of my imagination.
We inevitably experience hardship and suffering -- it's part of our road back to God... that is part of being in a human life. If we had no pain, we wouldn't need God. But God doesn't cause us pain. It's just part of life. It is through overcoming our own unique pain that we become of service to others through realizing that pain is universal.
Each of us can know God directly... there need be no go between. I believe in Gnosis. God lives in your heart. But sometimes God talks to us through people... God with hair or skin, because that's so much easier to understand. And God is not contained only within our heart, it is just where our unique relationship with God is. It's personal. Each person must find their own knowing of God. But God won't fit in a box. God is our home. We are already there.
Being an expert in the dogma of any church DOES NOT guarantee a personal relationship with God. I really cannot trust any organized religion to have the final say on the matters of truth around God. I know I could be completely wrong about this, which is a scary proposition, but I also find it scarier to accept what a large power wants to enforce.
God is love... and that love is eternal and everpresent. I may forget God or be unable to feel God, but that doesn't make God flicker on and off like a light bulb. My forgetting is my own human failing and most likely a result of fear or lack of faith. But God is patient with me.
God is loving.... I choose to believe in a God that is 100% on my side, with unconditional love for me and everyone. I do not believe in legalism or fire and brim stone. I believe that God will constantly improve me, purify me and remove my character defects when I ask "him" to, but I do not believe that "he" is a punishing and judging God.
God is not ompnipotent... We have free will. God cannot intervene. Therefore, we are free to hurt each other and make each other suffer. There are natural events that come to pass and create suffering. God is not there to decide which event will happen and which will not. Rather, God is there to comfort us and remind us of the love. He doesn't set up situations to test us or punish us, and he can't always protect us. (see Kushner book below)
Christ is a real force of love... but Christianity is not the religion he would have founded (as it has turned out) - imho. I am christian but only with a little "c." (No offense to anyone intended - by any of this). I have experienced the presence of Christ in my life and the lives of others. I believe that Christ came to bring love and an end to legalism and judgment. I believe he represents God's in a form we can envision, a great leader, a great model of how to live in Love. But there is too much hatred and legalism in the churches in his name. (On the other end of the spectrum, I have also tried UU churches and found God to be lacking there; I have tried Buddhist Dharma centers and found no God (only deities) there as well. However, I do not feel that Buddhism or other eastern philosophies necessarily are inconsistent with the way of Christ. All flowers turn their heads towards the sunlight of God.)
Fundamentalism of any religion only brings violence... Nothing needs to be said about the real violence (war, murder) done throughout time in the name of (fundamentalist) religion. There is also emotional violence as well. I believe I have been attracted to the call of fundamentalist religion only by my inner wish to find rules that I am breaking, so that I may be punished to act out my inner sense of being "bad." This is not divine. This is not what God wants for me.
Christ has been made INTO God, but he is not... there are many aspects of God and Christ is one way to connect with divinity, but not the only WAY. I do not believe in any form of fundamentalism.
There is a divine feminine face to God as well... one of the many aspects of God is the divine mother. Christ was even said to be the Hen to the chicks... Many Catholics worship the divinity of the spirit of Mary -- much to the dismay of fundie christians... alas.
There are as many paths to God as there need to be... perhaps as many as there are beings. It is never right to judge another's spiritual path or to view your own as superior.
There is karma, but we are not equipped to understand it... I don't think karma is some kind of linear point system that we can track. I do think that experiences create energy which returns and repeats. We are constantly swimming in cycles of positive and negative energies playing out. It's all lessons for our souls to learn.
We are what we think. Our thoughts make our world. [Course in Miracles]
We are all holy. My holiness blesses others.