1990-1997 EX-HUSBAND

Brian: 1990-1997

Brian became the bookkeeper at The Catbird Seat the last year I worked there. Our desks faced each other. He was awesome. It was as if we were the same person in (very) different bodies. At the time, I honestly thought he was gay and vice versa. Eventually, when I started to go to school to get my MSW, he was the one person at work that I missed the most, so we started going out. It was not dating in my mind at all, until finally he admitted he was interested in me. We were together for seven years. We never argued that I can remember. We were extremely accepting of each other, perhaps to a fault. We indulged in overeating like I never have. Eventually, I got depressed and then wanted relief and starting changing to lose weight and feel better. This self-preservation growth spurt eventually led to the end of our marriage (long story very short). We are still friends. He is awesome. He went to live in New York at a Jewish renewal center and later moved to Philadelphia. He became a Gestalt therapist.


Lessons Learned: Brian and I had "overlapping T-squares" which means that we share incredibly similiar karmic lessons in this life. We were truly psychic twins, despite occupping such different bodies. I learned what it was to be known deeply, to trust a human, to commit long term (7 years). I also learned that safety can be less than empowering and ultimately that indulgence is not always helpful. We are still friends.